The story: I used to be happy and loved kissing girls as a child, but my tyrannical father wouldn't have it. He treated me cruelly, aggressively, and shamefully in front of other human, all of which I didn't realize was done to make me anxious around women. In spite of his outward appearance, he was a evil and selfish man. No one supported me and stopped him. Since I am sweet, I didn't understand my life. I felt confused, alone and terribly sad. At 45, I first learned that no one showed love; they didn't want me to love and satisfy women. Since they are so lovely to kiss, hug, and have sex with, women have always been my goal since the day I was born. I'm living in a evil and wild world where social anxiety makes life hard and frustrating, and being with human is the last thing I can do. Rejected, ignored, and bullied. Not being myself and dealing with social anxiety was really hard, but I had to adapt and become amusing in order to be accepted and survive. In an attempt to save myself, since I was experiencing sudden and severe depression for no apparent reason, I had to seek professional help at 33, but it didn't help.
In order to prevent getting hurt—since human in my life is not sweet—I painted a living African mask that appears afraid. In real life, I was a living mask that seemed social, and funny, but on the inside I faced social anxiety. The African tribal mask represents the free, easy, calm, and accepting lifestyle of tribal human—a lifestyle that I find appealing—lives a life of humanity and steers clear of falsehood and evil. This allows me to be who I am—happy around women, willing to engage in more sexual relations in order to be fulfilled as a human.
